Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
