OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
