I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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