listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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