i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
