We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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