i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
