I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
now i know why i became what i already was.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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