Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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