I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
