Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
