"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Floor bacon is actually really good
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
