Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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