then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
