I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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