you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
