Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
