LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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