i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
