She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Randomize
