i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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