would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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