There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
