hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
