Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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