I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
