I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
