Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
