she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
