The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
