wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
