11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
