3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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