last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
