Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
