Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
