today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
