just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
