Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
