Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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