shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
