haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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