The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
