she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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