just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I think i got beer on your cat.
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