I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
