just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
