its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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