how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i barfeds in our rink
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
