idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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